Adult Puberty

Because this seems like the perfect picture to describe how I'm feeling LOL

You know when you're in your teens, you have all these grand plans for when you graduate college?

Recently, I read an old blog I used to write in about the Clippers HAHAHA

Guys, seriously... the passion was oozing out, it's really embarrassing.

I wanted so bad to be a sports journalist and at that time, I felt nothing could stop me from reaching what was once my "dream."

All four years of my college career was purely dedicated to one day working for an NBA team.

Then you graduate college...

And unless you're planning on going to grad/med/dental/pharmacy/law school etc... 

you're kind of like... now what?

But in reality, there are plenty of times where those don't even seem definite.

Life happens and plans change.

My dream is to still work in the NBA.
Perhaps not as a sports journalist, but the passion for sports is still there.

I don't consider myself old at all. Because I'm not.
To be honest, there are times I still feel like I'm still 18 hahaha

However, since graduating BYU almost two years ago, I often wondered, what now?

Even for the very short time I had a job, I kept asking myself what am I really supposed to be doing?

Nope, I haven't figured it out.

I've applied to many many jobs before having Leah... truly can't count anymore.

I had job interviews in my last month of pregnancy & even after having Leah, just doing what I thought would be best.

Yes, even after having Leah, now more than ever, I wonder, what now?

It has little to do with me wanting to be a stay-at-home mom with Leah and more to do with finding my "passion."

It's hard writing a blog post when I'm still in the middle of trying to figure things out.
Which is why this has been in draft for the past three weeks...

Do I want to make money right now? Yes yes yes!

I just want to be able to buy Leah cute stinkin' clothes & whatever else without hesitating. Ya know?!
I'm also cheap frugal heh.. so it's hard for me to just spend money when I don't really need it.

I can't remember the last time I bought clothes for myself...
I didn't buy a single piece of clothing when I was pregnant either!
Do I get an award for that or something?? LOL
At the same time, that's not really surprising because I was never much of a shopper.

Anyway...
I guess what I'm trying to say is...
I think it's okay to be figuring things out when you're in your 20s.
Though I'm sure there are plenty of people that have their life planned out and follow up on those plans, I know for a fact that a lot of people are still figuring it out!
There's still time!
And as long as you're taking steps forward, then you don't have to panic :)

I always thought my life would be "complete" once I became a mom.
I thought that was my ultimate goal.
And while it may be one of the most rewarding things I ever do in my life, I still am looking for a passion besides "mom-ing" ya know?

Once I find that, I'll let you all know what it is ;)
Probably not any time soon hahaha